Patience George
There are relationship breakups and then there are toxic relationship breakups. If you’ve ever been on the latter side or you find yourself there right now, you’re not alone.
These are seven totally normal things that comes with toxic relationship breakups…
1. Denial that it is over
They might have done you dirty but you’ll still find yourself questioning that the breakup ever happened. You’ll have a little glimpse of hope that they’d call and everything will be ok again. This is totally normal. You’re not stupid for having that kind of hope.
Still wondering if your relationship is toxic? These are 11 warning signs.
2. Missing the sh*t out of them
If the relationship was abusive or just toxic, you’ll find yourself missing this person. Your brain has a way of reminding you of all the good times and not the sh*tty experiences. Again, you’re not stupid for wanting to grab your phone, call them, and tell them you miss them. Your brain became addicted to them and being away is similar to having withdrawal symptoms.
3. Blaming yourself for everything
You’ll think about all the times you were in the wrong and blame yourself for how the relationship turned out. Your mind will convince you that if you had not done this or that, the relationship will still be there. This is one of the strongest things you’ll feel after a nasty breakup.
4. Hating yourself for staying
You think you should hate this person, yes? No! You’ll realize that you hate yourself for all the things you put up with just to preserve the relationship. It is important to understand that you simply believed in the goodness of a person. You were hoping that things will change and that is ok. You need to forgive yourself.
5. Losing friends
Be ready to be judged for staying and ignoring all the red flags. Note that it is very easy to lose friends after leaving a relationship that turned out to be toxic and abusive. People will also tell you to just move on without understanding the deep pain you’re in. If you do not want to lose the friendship, it is important to understand that whatever they say is from their own level of understanding. Do not take it personally.
6. Having a mix of good and bad days
As you begin to get better, this is one thing you must know. There will still be bad days months after the breakup. On those days, you might hate yourself even more because you thought you were over the whole situation.
7. Healing will happen
Despite everything that happened in the relationship and the rollercoaster of emotions after, know that healing will happen. Though it is important to note that time will not heal your wounds. It is what you do with the time that will heal those wounds.
You’re a rockstar, and we know you’ll get through this!
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